choices

Find the Joy in Your Life

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We are all struggling with something in our life. Health, relationships, financial hardships, mental well-being, physical well-being or know someone who is going through the same.

During these times, try to find the joy in life. Anything. There is always something good that can cancel out the bad. Celebrate life while you can. Celebrate the life you have with others. Take advantage of the time you have on this earth and make the most of it. You can’t get those moments back. There are no redos in life. One shot. That is it. Do whatever it is to make peace with yourself.

Sometimes you have to let the small and big things go. Is it worth the aggravation to get the last word in or go to extreme measures because you think you’re right? Everyone has their own beliefs and opinions but it doesn’t necessarily mean that is the only way.

Breathe, let go, appreciate, and think. Your brain is what control your emotions. Think positive and passionate. You still have a chance to get it right.

The choice is yours so who is to say…

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Seriously, who is to say that you have to like, love, or do something that you don’t want to? Other than obeying the law, everything and  every choice in life is yours and yours only to make. Some are good choices and some are bad, but they are yours. You’re the one who has to reap the rewards of your choices or pay the consequences.

Okay, what’s the point and what am I trying to get at right?  I have been a NY Giants fan  since I was 15-years-old. And a true fan at that. When they had a bad season other Giants fan ridiculed and said they suck. Me, on the other hand continuously praised them and stuck by their side through thick and thin. In my opinion, that is a true dedicated fan.

Three and a half years ago I met my boyfriend (Mike) who is a Packers fan. All though my love and dedication for the Giants have  never wavered, I did however gained a new respect for the Packers. I love the way they play. Rodgers, Jordy, Clay, Jake, etc., I must say they have it going on. Not only do I enjoy watching the team but the fans are so dedicated and support their team with unconditional love. How awesome is that?

My gripe is that people say there’s no way you can share your dedication to both the GMEN and Packers. You’re a trader. No, no, no. That’s not the case. Who is to say that I can’t share my love for both teams? Is there a fan police patrol that I’m unaware of???  In the scheme of things it is really ridiculous that there should even be a discussion about this kind of thing but then again I guess that’s what makes our world go around. I can love both teams and that is that.

But  “the choice is yours,” goes for anything and everything. You can love or do whatever YOU want to do. My whole life I was a pushover. I didn’t have the ability to say no or voice my opinion. Why?? I was afraid and didn’t have the confidence.

I can say over the years I learned to say what I wanted to and I learned to say no. I know it took me 40 years to do it but better late than never. I think it was kind of an instantaneous action. I just got fed up and said no more. I was suffering from my inability and so were my kids. The one thing I didn’t want to happen was for them to follow in my foot steps but I already had seen my bad trait being absorbed by them. Not good.

Learn to say NO

  1. First step is don’t be afraid. I think that is where it all stems from. We are afraid to say no. What are your fears and reason from holding you back? If you said no, what are the consequences or gains from doing so? I’d say it’s a big gain from the start because you are doing and saying what YOU want to do. That in itself is a HUGE accomplishment. Congratulations for taking that step in the right direction.
  2. Realize that it’s okay to say no. Like I said before it’s your choice and no one else’s. It’s your body, mind, and decision. No one is going to benefit from saying no but you and that is a good thing. It’s time to take care of yourself. You only live on this planet one time so as quick as you can start doing what you want to.
  3. The first time you start saying no acknowledge the feeling you get from it. How did it feel? I know when I started saying no it was more than just a feeling. It was a life altering change for me. By saying no it was a chain effect. I felt like my confidence level went through the roof and that was monumental for me. Confidence is a key factor to accomplish anything in life. I truly believe that.
  4. Go with your gut. If you have that feeling way deep down in your gut that something is telling you no, then go with it. It sounds like such a cliche to some but I’m an avid fan of going with your gut instinct. Trust me it works.

I hope I helped someone, anyone with issues about saying no. Remember you have everything to gain from it. Good luck.

 

 

People, life, relationship, hurt, choices, chances

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They piss me off. They also make my blood pressure rise. I left someone because he treated me and my boys horribly. I’m talking about my boyfriend of 5 years. He put on a show for his friends and family(sometimes)and acted like he really gave a shit. Behind closed doors we were living in hell. My son developed a stuttering problem over the course of two years and as soon I as left him, my sons stuttering problem stopped. He put us down, he screamed and yelled at us so much that my kids wore their earphones to their ipods and computer all the time. They didn’t want to hear it anymore and neither did I. He slipped from time to time and showed his true colors in front of his friends and family.

What I should have done from the beginning was take the advice of those who came to me and forewarned me about him and told me to stay away from him but stupid me, always giving someone the benefit of the doubt as usual.

I’m so happy and I hate it when people get in my ear and tell me how what I did wasn’t right, or how I’m going about things isn’t cool. How is it do they want me to go about it??? Stay with a person who belittled my kids and I? Stay with a person who made us a nervous wreck? Why just so we can make everyone’s life seem peachy??

All I can honestly say is that I tried. I gave it my best effort but I could do no more or I probably would have lost my kids to their dad. It was a bad situation that I had to make right and I did.

His house, his family, the camping trips, the big holidays, the presents for the kids, all that means nothing when you get back home and it’s just the four of us and it goes bad once again. Those times that are so far and few in between aren’t worth everything else that we had to go through. I wish things could have been different. There is so much more to the story but why bother? It’s like everyone else who goes through this it’s a relationship that went bad. I spent 18 years in an abusive relationship and there was no way I was going to spend the rest of my life in a similar situation. And, if the time ever arises again where I am not happy or I’m in a place where I don’t want to be in life, I’ll change it again. That is my option. This is life and we have the ability to make choices. If you don’t, your stupid.

Over and out for now until I feel the need to spill my guts once again.