Take Advantage of TIME. Welcome 2020


It’s Time to Take Advantage of TIME

If there is one thing, I could brainwash everyone to do, it would be to take advantage of time. Use it wisely, cherish every single second. People just read the words but don’t really listen. I know this because there are so many instances, events, people, that I wish I would have cherished more.

Not just the good times but the bad as well. I wish I could have cherished the bad and learned from my mistakes. Eventually I did but it took a few trial runs. Another way I wish I could have taken advantage of time would have been to do the things that I really wanted to do and not have just gone with the flow in fear that I would have upset someone if I didn’t.

There are too many (I’s) in there so I’m going to transition to you….lol  Anything that might remotely represent narcissism I have to switch gears. One of my pet peeves lol.

Another way to take advantage of time is to tell someone how you really feel. You love them, tell them. Who cares what the outcome is, the point of it is that you told them your true feelings. On the flipside, also be honest. Brutally, painstakingly, honest. No holding back. No suffering on the inside because you are afraid to hurt their feelings. It will be worse in the long run. Who knows, that person might not like you either and is going through the same emotions and thoughts you are as well. So, look at it this way, you are doing not only yourself a favor but them also. Sticking it out because you think that time after time things will change, nah it usually doesn’t. Why? Because in your gut you know it won’t and history always repeats itself. When all contemplation fails, listen to your gut!!! I have wasted literally years of my life weighing the pros and cons, be resilient in my fight for true love but when it’s not there, it’s not there. I will leave that for another post lol.

Take advantage of time by not procrastinating. If there is a thought in your mind about doing something, bettering yourself, finishing school, do it. You can’t rewind time and your age. As you get older things can sometimes get harder. Not all the time, just sometimes.

Lastly, but not really because I have a ton more to say but I’m running out of time, is take care of you. Seriously, I underestimated that saying. Totally. Self-care sounds so corny to some, but there is so much truth to it I can’t even begin to tell you. Indulge in the good stuff. Water. Yes water. When I am down and out, I drink water. Drink it. Try it for a day or two and see how your mind clears up and your heart doesn’t ache. Yes, I know it sounds crazy but it worked for me. Either that or I have lost my mind. Okay enough of the water lol. What you do to your body will have an everlasting affect for the rest of your life, so take care of it. Your body, mind, and soul. Take the time to treat yourself right because no one else will do it for you.

On that note I have to hightail it out of here. Happy New Year and I wish you all a million times of happiness, health, and prosperity. Welcome 2020!!

 

 

 

Just looking for a miracle, one last time


All I want for this Christmas is peace. Plain and simple. Peace within the current relationship I am in now. That’s it. I’m giving him one more chance. He agreed that he will seek help for his anger and other issues he has going on and I am going to go with that for now only because it is Christmas.

I am a domestic violence survivor and I refuse to be a survivor again. I don’t want to go through what I went through before. I refuse to let my kids witness any form of abuse whatsoever. I went through physical, verbal, and mental abuse for 20 years and I am not going allow it again. I have been with him for 1 year now and putting it bluntly I don’t have the time to waste on worrying every second of my life. This is it. He has never hit me but the verbal aspect of it is debilitating at times. I’m not stupid or dependent on others. I just don’t walk away easily and give people the benefit of the doubt too much sometimes.

“He” is on notice so I am taking this minute by minute. He went through something traumatic at Christmas time when he was younger but that is no excuse because so did I and I never but the blame on anything or anyone else for my actions so he shouldn’t either.

Today is the day before Christmas eve. This is weighing heavily on my mind and heart. I hope my decision is right by giving him this last chance. If not, I’m out. No ifs, ands, or buts.

Please, please, please just give me this one Christmas miracle that all will go well. So far since our discussion last Friday it has been going okay but I’m at my wits end taking it min by min. I need peace.