I guess I already know the answer to my own question which is: why am I hesitant to blog, brag, or be happy about the relationship I’m in? Okay, so the answer to that is…because I don’t want to jinx myself and ruin a good thing. I’m so petrified of losing this or whatever that it is that I have going on with this great man I met and I’m acting like it’s no big deal when in actuality this life changing relationship for me is a huge deal.
I am so happy but yet scared and in denial at the same time. I lost my mom two years ago to the date on this coming August 19th and she was my best friend. I lost my house to a fire on Christmas Eve 4 months after I lost her and then my dog died 3 months after the fire. I’m not saying any of this to get sympathy because I am somewhat okay with all of that and came to terms with the fact that it’s all a part of life and they cycle that brings us to the place where we are meant to be.
I am blogging about it because I believe those things is what are holding me back from really enjoying what I have accomplished from that time in my life on until now.
Since then I have changed my life drastically. I knew if I didn’t I would have been dead, literally. I was spiraling down and fast prepping myself for a fatal crash landing.
My kids are what saved me. There was no way that I was going to have anyone raise them besides myself. Even though I don’t feel like I am going to be able to make a difference in this world, like Mother Theresa, but I feel like that my boys are going to be something big one day. So hard to explain but I’m on a roll so bear with my tangent that I’m gong off on!!
Back to my original reason why I am blogging today is because for the first time in a really long while, I am truly happy. I love the man I am going to spend the rest of my days with. He is my true best friend and soul mate. The one I have been looking for but never though it would be possible to find someone like him.
I’m not saying that our relationship is 100% perfect. No one has that. But he has the qualities that I have been looking for. I guess what I’m also trying to say is DON’T GIVE UP. Whoever you are reading this and if you are unhappy with your life in any area, it will get better. I promise. I never thought it was possible for me.
I truly believe the key to turning things around is positive thinking. You cannot buy a quick fix program to help you get your life back on track. It all comes from within. Think about what you want in life. Write it down and even cut pictures from a magazine or book of what you envision your life to be like and those dreams will come true. I did just that and it happened I swear. Oh the only book that I did read was, “The Secret.” I forgot the authors who put it together but it helped me in leaps and bounds. I still refer back to it from time to time when I feel like I need a little boost.
I’m not sure who and if anyone is actually going to take the time to read this post but if you do and you need someone to talk to, I’m here. I’m not judgmental or make the conversation about me. I am here to just to listen and offer some words of comfort if you need them.
Yea, I might just be a girl from Long Island, New York but I have been through a lot in my life that I believe gives me the credentials to help others. They say life experience is the best and I most certainly have to agree with that saying.